I spent some time this weekend listening to various audio from some of my usual inspirations: Jack Ma, Jim Rohn or Tony Robbins. I found a gem in one audio of Tony Robbins, and I couldn’t resist sharing it with you. It is a simple belief, that could change forever the communication with your Loved One. I’ll link to the audio at the end, and give you the moment where he explains it. If you are motivated or inspired, it is a two hours audio but listening to it might worth the time!
The belief is that in any communication with someone when you get a response, it is either a loving response or cry a for help.
Let’s look at the cry for help, as it is the less intuitive. Let’s imagine that you come home after work, and in the following hours, you fight with your partner. Your partner is mad at you and is blaming you. While it might not be the best way to communicate, it is still communication, and that is a cry for help. We rarely fight for the reason of the fight, there is something beneath it. Your partner might struggle emotionally, they might have received bad news that day, or they were building resentment over the lack of support for cleaning the house.
You could choose to yell back at them, but then you are both crying for help. All you want is love and understanding. Your partner wants that too. But you could end up yelling at each other.
When someone is having a cry for help answer, we should give them a loving response. We should ask ourselves what happened to them, so they are so mad? We can be compassionate and loving. It will disarm their anger and offer a chance to connect instead of fighting.
Not everyone you will meet in your life is capable of receiving what they need, a loving answer when the reality is that they are craving for it (but not aware of it as we’ve just seen). Some people will stay mad (and obviously confused). That is why I want us to focus on the context of our own relationship. So you will know and (re)learn when a loving answer is appropriate (hint: OFTEN!). Sometimes, a break might be needed before the loving response can reach. In the heat of the moment, touching with love is not always an easy task. As anger is an emotion, it is a wave, so it comes down. And then we have another chance at our loving response!
Thank you for your time and reading my post.
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